Last weekend me and my husband attended a marriage course by Al Kauthar Institute called Home Sweet Home. This was one of the best marriage courses I’ve attended as we were not only taught the theory about marriage in Islam but how to implement what the Quran and sunnah say and also taking into account the way our lives are today in the west and what academic research is telling us about why marriages fail and how to avoid it.
Sheikh Alaa Elsayed was an amazing teacher mashaAllah teaching us everything from how to choose a spouse, the engagement and wedding, understanding your spouse in the beginning of your marriage, the responsibilities of the husband and wife, how to identify issues and strengths in your marriage so you can continue to improve it, why people get divorced and how to avoid it, and lastly the fundamentals of a happy marriage.
I wanted to share some of the things we learnt but I would recommend that everyone should attend this course whether you’re single, newlyweds or been married for years.
The Art of Choosing a Spouse
Before we can begin to start looking for a spouse we need to know why are we getting married? you need to think about why you want to get married so that we can start this search with the right intentions. As a class we came up with a list of reasons as to why we want to get married.
- complete half your deen
- complete half of your spouses deen
- follow the Sunnah
- halal intimacy
- having a family
- raise righteous children
- have a righteous spouse
- avoiding sin
- lower your gaze
- help each other get to jannah
“Choose carefully for your children; marry the suitable and give in marriage to them.” (Ibn Majah)
The number one duty towards your children is to choose a righteous spouse.
The best spouse is a best friend that is a lover.